Divorce simply means a legal separation of assets. But when you are going through a divorce not every problem falls under “separation of assets.” The many different reasons you could have for divorcing often makes the process very emotional. And if there are children involved, there are practical issues that does not get resolved when the divorce is settled.
We divorce our spouse — not our children. But nevertheless we still have to share and divide the time we have with our children. And it is exactly the custody of the children and the question of child support that are the most frequently disputed areas of a divorce.
We have law set statutes for how to divide assets and which assets to divide but we do not have laws guiding us on how to be as parents after a separation and divorce. Our emotions do often not allow us to truly do what’s in the best interest of our children.
It is common for mothers to feel like children are their allies, or the need to block access to the Father to punish him for leaving the family. For others, divorce is the freedom they “needed” to avoid the responsibility of raising children.
In cases of disputes over child custody we always seek the solution that is best for the child. In most cases the child is best served with getting to spend time with both parents. So we will try settling the case in a way that satisfies all parties, but especially the children.
If that is not possible, because one parent is acting unreasonable or is unfit as a parent, we will take the case to trial. In court we will argue why it is in the best interest of child to be raised by one parent over the other.
The question of child support can get very hostile. Often mothers feel that the father intentionally lower his income to avoid paying child support. Fathers often feel that the child support is supporting the ex and not their child and therefore refuse to pay. Child Support is guided by Child Support Standards Act which dictates how much must be paid for a child or children and what additional costs must be paid by the non-custodial parent. However, hidden income or other the custodial parent’s spending habits make child support very contested despite the fact that it’s outlined in a statue.